This week's Monday gymspiration comes in the form of an elderly gentlemen at an unidentified rec center, who needed only 40 seconds to model the quiet discipline, serene concentration, and precise execution to which you should aspire in all your athletic endeavors. Our hero, who bears a startling resemblance to Bernie Sanders, begins the clip by effortlessly swishing a free throw, and things only improve from there. Every shot except for one plunges cleanly through the net, guided to and through its intended destination with an unconscious flick of the wrist. The only outlier bounces gently around the rim before rolling harmlessly into the cup—the proverbial shooter's roll that players of all ages, sizes, and skill levels hope that their hours of practice will one day afford. Behold!
Bearded douche w/a a rib tattoo doing something unnecessarily athletic, outshined by senior draining free throws.
— Lord Single Malt (@Singlemaltfiend) March 26, 2017
After each make, Future Steve Nash shuffles a few steps forward to recover the results of his handiwork, but his unfailing accuracy means he barely has to move, really. A few steps back, and he has already gathered himself, putting down one good two-handed concentration dribble before launching another flawless arcing shot toward the sky, its fate for a moment unknown, but never really in doubt.
Below, from our friends at Basketball Reference, is the list of the top ten NBA players of all time in free throw percentage. There is Ray Allen. There is Steph Curry. There is Peja Stojakovic. (Wait, Peja Sojakovic!?) None of these supernaturally gifted shooters, though, have a sparkling, elusive 1.000 next to their name, which means that none of them are on Basketball Bernie's level.
Fitness has no age and no expiration date, friends. May this man serve as a lesson to all of us.
The only flaw in this video, really, is the shirtless bro in the foreground dangerously clambering about on a meathead jungle gym fashioned out of carefully balanced dumbbells, for some godforsaken reason. Put your clothes on and get out of the way, man. We're trying to watch something impressive here.